Stop asking why I don’t want to go to parties

By Rachel Royster | Copy Desk Chief

I really want to go out and have loads of fun and hang out with people on the weekends, but I just can’t. I would feel SO guilty and anxious the moment I stepped out of my dorm room.

Look. I’ve seen the girls in my hall getting all dressed up, and I’ve seen the pictures and videos when they come back. It looks like so much fun! I want to go! I just can’t. I care too much about the people around me. And honestly, I don’t see that as a problem.

You see, I just can’t bear the idea that if I were going out all the time and got the virus and I brought it back to my friends and all their friends, I’d be sending them all to quarantine. Not to mention the fact that I have family coming into town every now and again, and when I don’t, my best friends do. In short, getting a positive test would be absolutely chaotic.

I know, I know. Just because I test positive doesn’t mean every single person around me will too. But my closest friends and I see each other everyday, so they’d definitely be contact traced. And say they test positive. Then they have to contact trace people, and it’s just a lot in my book.

Plus, some of those friends have already been contact traced and put in quarantine, and I saw the toll being alone for 10-14 days had on them. Whether it took a toll mentally, emotionally or academically, there was always a price they had to pay to keep others safe by going into quarantine.

Not only do I not want to put them in that position again, but I don’t honestly think that I could do it. I thrive off of being around my friends, even if it’s just sitting on our phones in the same room. I absolutely love spending time with them, so I just know I couldn’t possibly stop the countless hours I spend alongside them cold turkey.

I’m not saying anything extreme like people that party are inconsiderate or daft, trust me. All I’m saying is that it’s not for me. I want to go out. I do. And I still have my random adventures, just not in small spaces with lots of people maskless. I’m kindly asking that people stop giving me a hard time for saying no to the party of the night and just respect my decision without badgering me for an explanation.