By Katherine Hatcher | Staff Writer
You know that feeling at the end of high school when you’re on top of the world? The one that feels like you’re invincible because it’s like “High School Musical 3” where everyone knows who they are and who their friends are? Besides the breaking out in song, of course.
As wonderful as that feeling is, not many people talk about how quickly it changes when coming to college. Freshman year and college itself are continuous roller coasters of meeting people, and it’s awesome — if you love talking to people like I do.
Although I enjoyed attending welcome events and getting to know other Baylor people, I found out quickly that the people I met were not similar to me. We had different interests, senses of humor and even style.
At first, the differences were intimidating because I went from a high school friend group that I agreed with everything on to not immediately clicking with people like I thought I would.
Even though Baylor is definitely a bubble, college is full of people from all walks of life, and it can be hard to find where your people are. You will probably find yourself taking two possible routes: embracing who you are in this new season of life or changing yourself to what others think is cool.
Just in case it wasn’t obvious, the second route is not worth the time and stress. Luckily, this dangerous road can be avoided with some mindset shifts.
When everyone starts to find their people and make friends, the comparison game picks up quickly. It can be easy to focus on how many relationships others have as seen through their Instagram, making you feel like you’re doing something wrong. In these moments, it’s important to be grateful and focus on the quality friendships you do have, even though there may be fewer of them. Don’t let comparison steal the joy of the genuine relationships you do have.
After hanging out with people, I often found myself trying to fit a mold that I thought people wanted to see at Baylor, which made me like a lot of things about myself less. If this happens, remember to celebrate others’ differences from yours. Appreciate who they are, not who you aren’t.
Trying to find your people may feel tiring when you feel like you’re giving and receiving nothing in return. Remember that friendships and community are supposed to be fun and help you grow. It’s necessary to find places to plug yourself into so that you can find a reliable community to surround yourself with. Trust me, it is a game changer.
I met a lot of my friends standing next to them at football games through striking up friendly conversations. Additionally, it was helpful to play intramurals with girls I didn’t know super well. I met one of my now roommates in flag football. At the beginning of the season, I didn’t know who she was, and now, she’s my friend and I asked her to live with me.
Although it was a different kind of fun, joining a life group at Harris Creek Baptist Church was the quickest way I felt connected and loved. People respond the best to vulnerability, so be open about who you are in settings like this — deeper connections with others will arise. If you invest in a group of people consistently, you’ll find the people you’re supposed to be with.
Although this roller coaster of college may include ups, downs and twists, it is so worth it because of how you grow through it. You may not see it yet, but your people and a beautiful future are in store.
Be open about what you love. Be friendly and celebrate the relationships that you have. Don’t give up on finding those quality friendships around you, even through the struggles.
