By Kassidy Tsikitas |Staff Writer
Deep in the heart of Baylor’s Counseling Center, Student Health and Wellness offers services that help individuals and couples struggling with mental health and conflict.
Baylor’s counseling center offers multiple services and tools students can use to talk about the problems they are experiencing to a professional, and some counselors even specialize in relationships.
“Research shows that relationships affect our mental health, health behaviors, physical health and even our healing rate and mortality risk,” the Counseling Center website states.
Students have benefitted from attending couples therapy, whether or not the sessions resulted in a remaining relationship among the partners. Houston sophomore Brooke Foreman said going through counseling helped her realize her worth.
“Communicating is key. Instead of overthinking and brewing thoughts in your head, just communicate your feelings to your partner and listen to what they have to say,” Foreman said. “Most of the time we create problems in our head, and it causes a bigger problem in the relationship.”
Foreman also said communication can help with mental health and has helped her learn to love herself. She said she advises everyone to give therapy a try.
“When we often have problems with our significant other, we ask [for] advice from our friends, but it can be very biased,” Foreman said. “Going to a trusted adult who doesn’t pick sides and who has a license to help you is very trusting.”
Dr. David Pooler, professor in the school of social work, said counseling can be beneficial to gain insight into the patterns and habits of both parties in the relationship.
“Identifying productive ways of relating through listening to a partner and gaining self-awareness have significant payoffs in the present moment and in the future,” Pooler said. “People also need to learn to have realistic expectations of themselves and each other, and counseling can help with that.”
Pooler also said avoiding the problems in relationships — no matter how big they are — can erode the trust between the couple and result in the relationship being the primary source of pain.
If couples book a session, the relationship can flourish or completely end. Despite the outcome, Pooler said the most important thing is to learn from the problems and grow individually.
“[After counseling] I see people listen more effectively and communicate their needs, wishes and wants more effectively. They learn to be more healthy as an individual,” Pooler said. “They have more ease and peace, individually and with their partner.”
Dr. Brad Brenner, professional counseling psychologist and co-founder of the Therapy Group of NYC, wrote on the overall success of couples counseling and reported there is a 98% success rate.
“The success of couples therapy and other factors contributes to a decreasing divorce rate in the United States,” Brenner said.
His article goes on to explain the steps in counseling such as finding the right fit, setting goals and a timeline. Counseling allows patients to figure out the root of their problems.
Houston freshman Lucy Varnell said in her Child and Family Studies classes, she is currently learning about different practices and meanings
of relationships.
“If you cannot learn to communicate on your own, bringing in a third party may help a lot. It is much better to be prepared in case a fight were to come up rather than wait until there is an issue,” Varnell said.
Varnell also said all relationships are bound to have problems; however, people should never stay in one that causes mental and physical harm.
“If you and your partner have numerous fundamental differences, really consider what is important to you, because marriage truly is meant to be a lifelong commitment,” Varnell said.