By Eric Gilmore | Guest Contributor
Fall is here, and your little piggies are looking for a way to stay warm. Here are my top five suggestions for shoes you should get this fall if you want extra style points.
Photo courtesy of A Days March.
A Day’s March – Chunky Leather Loafer
What’s the difference between you and the guy she likes? He has a pair of loafers, and you don’t. No more old man, dad loafers. We are talking sleek, slick, slack loafers with a little bit of height for all my short kings out there. Dress them up, dress them down — either way, the loafer is the way. Don’t be afraid of investing in a nice pair of loafers. They are a proven way to get you ladies.
Photo courtesy of Tecovas.
Nothing says “I ride a motorcycle and shred the guitar” more than a nice pair of solid black boots. You think Johnny Depp got so cool wearing sneakers? If you answered yes to that question, stop reading. But if you answered no, you are cool and you need some boots on your feet. Hit them with some flared jeans — maybe a little dress pant action. Either way, don’t be afraid to whip these bad boys out when you’re feeling a little rock ‘n’ roll. Beat them up for extra style points, and you will be rocking all the way to the free world.
Maybe you aren’t comfortable with being too cool, and that is OK. This shoe is perfect for all you guys who are retired from collecting expensive basketball shoes. Now it is time to collect expensive outdoorsman shoes. These shoes not only look like something your dad wears; they’re very expensive too. Don’t worry about getting chicks in these shoes though. You won’t. The only people who will be complimenting your pair of Solomons are men. Flex your new hobby of being outdoorsy with a pair of Solomon XT-6.
Photo courtesy of Nordstom.
Are you a man who likes to drink black coffee, listen to jazz and read a nice book, all while thinking about living in the south of France? Well, do I have the shoe for you. Expensive, beautiful and unknown: The French PARABOOT Derby is for you. There’s nothing like wearing a shoe that not only looks this cool but also is this expensive. You don’t need to worry about your friends copying you because surely they aren’t dumb enough to spend the money. But if you are dumb enough, be sure to take lots of pictures while you’re out in the park wearing your PARABOOTs because I’m sure someone will appreciate them.
Photo courtesy of Birkenstock.
To all my dudes out there, hear me out. Nobody wants to see your toes. So put your dogs away and get yourself some Birky Bostons. Now you can have all that toe freedom that you enjoy without making everyone in class uncomfortable. Wear these with shorts, pants, cold, hot — I don’t care. I personally wear mine like slippers but a little more formal. Either way, if you get a pair, I’m sure you will find a girl with a matching pair. There you go: These shoes have now just given you a new relationship.
Take my opinions or don’t; I don’t care. At the end of the day, I’m still swagged out.
