URSA speed bumps or Mount Everest?

By Charlie Wailes | Reporter

Speed bumps. Everyone has to deal with them, but as far as I know, most people don’t seem to have an opinion on them. I do.

The speed bumps at the URSA apartments are unusually and annoyingly high. Why do I think they’re too high? Picture someone driving 2 mph over them, only for their entire car to rattle and shake.

I remember the first time I unknowingly drove over the speed bumps two years ago. I was very excited to meet the person who would become my current girlfriend, but when I went over the speed bumps, I almost hit my head on the roof of my car.

At that moment, I thought, “Oh good heavens, did I accidentally run over something or somebody?” I hadn’t. It was just the good old URSA speed bumps.

Let me offer a comparison. I live at University Parks Apartments, and I have to drive over multiple speed bumps every time I’m there. Does my car jump up and down from going over them? Absolutely not. I go on my merry way and think nothing of it. This is how it should be at URSA.

It’s not like this is a problem with a singular speed bump at URSA. For anyone reading this who hasn’t been over there, this is a problem with all of them. You’ve been warned.

If I understood this from URSA’s point of view, maybe they were trying to slow down college students and prevent them from blowing around corners.

Am I being overdramatic? Maybe. But I might also have some validation.

My car has an automatic locking system on it. I had been driving it for two years before I came to Baylor, and nothing ever seemed to be amuck — that is, until I spent about two months driving over those speed bumps. My automatic locking system stopped working, and I couldn’t quite figure out why. Whenever I drove over those things, I could hear a piece of something on the inside of the driver’s side door moving around.

Yes, I do believe the speed bumps somehow broke the lock on the inside of my door. Is this enough proof to support my complaint? Perhaps. Other people may not agree, but that’s probably because they don’t live there or have to visit often.

I would slow down to a snail’s pace, and the speed bumps would still make my car jump around a surprising amount. They probably won’t ever get changed, but if they do, you can bet I’ll jump for joy.