By Mary Thurmond | Photo Editor
At Baylor, it often feels like individuality is quietly discouraged in favor of fitting into a very specific mold. Clean-cut. White. Christian. Smiling. Dressed like you just walked out of a church group Instagram post. It’s not an official uniform, but you’ll quickly learn that the further you stray from it, the more invisible you become.
There’s a suffocating pressure at our university, not always shouted out loud but whispered through glances, side-eyes and subtle exclusions. It tells you that if you’re not wearing the right outfit, worshipping at the right church or saying the right things, you don’t belong. The phrase “Love thy neighbor” gets thrown around, but only if that neighbor blends in.
Being different here doesn’t make you interesting. It makes you suspicious. When you walk across campus with dyed hair or piercings or just wearing clothes that don’t scream Southern Baptist-core, you can feel eyes on you. Sometimes it feels like you’re some kind of social threat for daring to express yourself.
For me, individuality has always been something to be proud of. It’s part of how I understand myself: how I dress, how I think and how I express what matters to me. But Baylor has taught me that being proud of who you are isn’t always ideal. I’ve been overlooked, underestimated and even dismissed, not because of my ideas or my work, but because I don’t fit the mold.
And I’m not alone. I’ve talked to students who are queer, students of color, students who are nonreligious or belong to other faiths. They’ve all felt it. The quiet push to stay in the background unless we’re willing to sand down the parts of ourselves that don’t “fit.” It’s a subtle kind of erasure that doesn’t leave bruises, but it does leave scars.
This culture of conformity doesn’t just affect people socially. It limits how we think. When you’re more worried about being accepted than being honest, you stop asking questions. You stop challenging ideas. You stop growing. Baylor talks a lot about community and faith, but those things can’t exist fully without difference. True faith doesn’t shrink in the face of diversity — it grows from it.
Individuality isn’t a threat to unity. It’s the foundation of it. When people are allowed to be fully themselves, without fear of being pushed aside, they bring their best ideas, their most passionate creativity and their most authentic selves to the table. That’s what makes a community strong.
So, to anyone who feels like they don’t belong here because they don’t blend in: you’re not wrong for being different. You’re not alone. And to those who do fit the mold, it’s OK. There’s nothing wrong with being exactly who you are, just like there’s nothing wrong with the rest of us choosing to be exactly who we are. The problem isn’t belonging. It’s believing that only some people deserve to.
So don’t apologize for being different. Don’t apologize for standing out. And don’t apologize for being exactly who you are. Because you don’t have to change to belong. Belonging should never require becoming someone else.
