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    The Baylor Lariat
    Home»Opinion»Editorials

    Who says leftovers are bad? The Lariat discusses editorial topics that didn’t make the cut

    Baylor LariatBy Baylor LariatDecember 4, 2015 Editorials No Comments4 Mins Read
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    Throughout the semester, the editorial board meets weekly to pitch ideas and vote on four topics to supply the editorials for the following week. After much debate on each issue, the members then take a stance on the topics, flesh out the details and examine counterarguments. Our sharp cartoonist then summons his wit with every single editorial and draws a new comic for each print issue.

    While some weeks we’re bone dry on good ideas, other times it’s a struggle to narrow it down to just four. Some were proposed in the board several times but never quite made the cut.

    Here are some of the Lariat’s favorite reject ideas and our quick-and-dirty stances on each:

    KUDOS TO DEXTER

    Last fall, a maniac murdered his girlfriend by stabbing her, dismembering her and wrapping her remains in cling wrap. Sound familiar? The boy claimed he was inspired by his television hero, serial killer Dexter from Showtime’s series of the same name.

    While a couple of the board members agreed that this was another example of our culture’s desensitized consumption of media, the others were just really impressed by this guy’s dedication to the craft. You can guess who the show’s fans were.

    MOUNTAIN DON’T

    Have we mentioned how much gall Baylor must’ve had to swap out our 23 flavors of Dr Pepper for…Pepsi? In Waco? The nerve.

    What’s next, Mountain Dew Hour on Tuesdays?

    THE WEEKND’S TUNES

    Trust us: The Lariat loves The Weeknd, and many of the newspapers this semester were brought to you by his album, “Beauty Behind the Madness.”

    But as the world sings along to his croons, do we not also hear the demeaning, derogatory lyrics against women he sings over and over on a catchy tune? Are feminists upset about this, too? We have so many questions.

    NO HEALTHY FOOD IN WACO

    With all the new food joints popping up in Waco — In-N-Out Burger is a God-send — one thing is very apparent: The amount of healthier options close to campus is next to zero. Yes, we’re happy with the new Zoe’s Kitchen, especially as an alternative to the daily-visted Panera Bread. Especially on late nights, though, when Subway doesn’t sound good after the 12th time that week, we spend most our nights livin’ in a fast food paradise. And our waistline is telling on us.

    SQUATTY POTTY

    The Lariat cares about your colon health, and you should, too. If a plastic toilet stool makes you poop like a unicorn, we’re in.

    Our editor-in-chief really rallied behind this one, but everyone thought it was a crappy idea.

    FREE AND FOR SALE

    Baylor’s Free and For Sale page on Facebook is a marketplace for reasonably priced bookshelves and frat house couches. It is not, however, a place for angry Bears to air out grievances following a controversial issue — most recently, the TCU defeat.

    Can we not just get back to buying/selling our garbage in peace? If you want to talk smack, Yik Yak will absolutely appreciate it.

    COLLEGE IS NOT A DAYCARE

    Oklahoma Wesleyan’s president Everett Piper is fed up with hurting your feelings in the college setting. We couldn’t agree more.

    In an open letter to the students, Piper wrote that society has trained students to resort to victimization rather than self-actualization.

    Face it, Millennials: We’re all a bunch of narcissists and egotists. How dare he say those things that accurately describe us.

    ICEBERG NEWSROOM

    We know it applies to no one outside the staff, but winter coats indoors during the early part of September is a bit much. Those aren’t the sounds of keyboarding clicking; that’s the sound of our teeth chattering under mounds of blankets. We can only drink so much hot coffee without our hearts stopping.

    PARKED ON A FEELIN’

    [Insert another inflated argument about how parking for cars/mopeds/bikes/motorcycles/magic carpets still sucks at Baylor. But we REALLY mean it this time.]

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