By Mariah Bennett | Staff Writer
If you like to cheat or just be generally awful, stop using your partner to be your brand or enhance it. They’re not a trophy. They’re definitely out of your league, and you’re definitely insecure.
Originally, this was supposed to be an article just about the concept of cheating, specifically because of the drama surrounding the man with the personality and looks of cardboard, Ned “Infidelity” Fulmer, with a smidge of John Mulaney.
Also, I am not judging you if you still find some of Mulaney’s comedy funny. He is funny sometimes. He was also disrespectful to his ex. These things can both be true.
It would be easy, commonly repeated and very, very true to say that cheating is primarily due to the cheater being impulsive and selfish with a desperate need for validation. I don’t have personal experience with that, but I have eyes and can see it.
I mean, we have a great example of looks not mattering in break-ups when it comes to the stand-up comedian and his rebound.
However, what is more interesting in these two scandals of Mulaney and Fulmer — and what is perhaps even more disgusting on the betrayers’ part — is that the victims in these situations were a large part of their brand and popularity. This should be examined in order to prevent it from happening on smaller scales in our society.
If you’ve been living under a rock and haven’t touched your computer, go search those last two names on your own. I don’t want to rehash their betrayals fully.
To sum up the facts, Fulmer confirmed his infidelity; Mulaney has not, but he somehow got his new partner pregnant in the middle of February, after having asked his ex-wife for a divorce sometime in the beginning of February. Again, nothing was confirmed, but it is evident the man could joke about his wife but couldn’t treat her with basic respect.
Both of these men had an obsession with using their wives to enhance their careers, albeit on different spectrums. Even with his image in shambles, Fulmer still did a PR walk days after the scandal broke.
Growing up, I watched both men online at some point, and I remembered their images.
“Fulmer was known for maintaining a ‘family man’ image and even incorporated his wife and children into his content,” a Forbes article reads.
As a former Try Guys watcher, I can confirm this was literally the man’s personality. He mentioned his wife and family obsessively — every video, nonstop. This is the man who wrote a cookbook surrounding his relationships and made videos about his family and his care for them.
Fulmer claimed he lost focus, according to his last tweet, but he sure seemed focused on using the people in his life who he betrayed for branding and cash — not just his family, but those affected by association for working with him in the first place.
While doing so less than Fulmer, Mulaney portrayed similar actions in his divorce scandal. Although he likes to beat around the bush on this topic publicly, his lack of respect for his ex-wife was apparent while they were together and apart.
As someone who grew up watching his stand-up, which I will admit had funny parts, I remember how he also mentioned his former partner a lot — whether it be her standing up for him, him introducing her to his female friends or their beloved dog, Petunia.
After their divorce, some of it was bit rough to look back on, especially as an adult with the context of the real lack of respect.
It is best explained in an article by Malkah Bressler with the subtitle, “Post-divorce, it’s hard not to see his comments about Anna Marie Tendler for what they are: gross stereotypes of Jewish women.”
“Something did not feel right,” Bressler said. “Emphasizing that his now-ex-wife is a short, bossy, Jewish … unnerved me. It didn’t feel like a celebration, but more like an exoticization. Mulaney was marking Tendler as an other … The more I think about it, the more I find that Mulaney’s celebration of Anna Marie Tendler reads as a form of toxic masculinity, one in which white cis Christian men prevent others from entering mainstream culture.”
What do both of these men have in common? An obsession with using their wives to enhance their careers. Even with his image in shambles, Fulmer still did a PR walk.
It was a bit hard to find scientific research on using a partner for branding, and I personally lack experience in infidelity situations like the current scandals.
However, I can say I’ve seen and experienced the phenomenon of both genders in a partnership using the other for gain, similar to the branding these celebrities do. I’ve also seen them disrespect their significant other just as easily as these men did through their actions.
Whether for looks, for status or to enhance anything in their life socially, both men used their wives for their careers.
In my opinion, these two men’s very public stories are a learning opportunity — an opportunity to observe those in your life who may be committing, perhaps on a smaller scale, similar actions, even if they aren’t cheating. Your significant other isn’t for gain; they’re for partnership.
They’re a person, a human with emotions and thoughts. They matter more than your ego and your lack of heart — and hair. They’re not a trophy. They’re definitely out of your league. And you’re probably balding.
These stories are a reminder to watch out for the people in our lives who may do this and to avoid them, call them out or at least let their partner know what is going on and that they deserve more than this.
Don’t be like the former coworkers who come out and say they knew or aren’t surprised and did nothing years after leaving the company; be better. At the very least, you’ll be giving them the information at hand to make an informed decision.
