By Josh Siatkowski | Lead Writer
Like many other rising college seniors, I spent the last ten weeks of my life pretending to be someone I’m not (or at least not yet). But, even as our generation rightly prioritizes authenticity, the apparent departure from that value as an intern is not such a bad thing.
On the first day of my internship at a bank in Houston, I already felt out of place. My full suit, an unwelcome swap for the shorts and t-shirts I had donned for the last month, grew sticky as the humidity surrounded it on the walk to my car.
Once I made it to the office, I spent 10 minutes looping around the building searching for the entrance to the parking garage. And when I finally got upstairs to start my first task, I realized very quickly that I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.
Then I thought back to a word that’s seen a rise in popularity.
Oh shoot, I’m “LARPing.”
Although it sounds like the name for an alien species, “LARP” is actually an acronym for “live action role-playing.” The word became popular in the 1990s among groups like Dungeons and Dragons players, who dressed up to immerse themselves in their games, Mental Floss’ Eden Gordon writes.
But today, Gordon says, pop culture has assigned the word a broader, more negative definition. It’s now commonly used to insult those who are in any way “pretending to live a lifestyle they don’t have access to.”
People who rent luxury cars for the day just to pose for pictures and metropolitans who wear blue collar clothing while working from cushy offices are just a few examples of who the Internet calls out for “LARPing.”
Another great example? Me — and probably millions of other college students — at my summer internship. I lacked the skills, experience, vocabulary, wardrobe and haircut of a respectable banker, yet I still spent the last three months trying to convince my superiors that I had all of those things.
As a generation jaded by corporate perfection and the unrealistic representations of life on social media, it’s not surprising that numerous studies, including one from EY Consulting, show that authenticity is Generation Z’s most valued trait. And being a member of that cohort, I too felt uncomfortable with my obvious facade as a banker.
But even as we rightly prioritize the real and dismiss the disingenuous, it doesn’t mean we should always view trying on new identities as a negative thing. Nor does it even mean actually having multiple identities is a bad thing.
Rhetoric scholars agree that personal and professional identities are two different, yet equally real aspects of the working individual’s persona. Marta Barquier of business blog Do Better explains it well: “At work we do more than perform tasks; we also construct an identity.”
The Professional Writing and Rhetoric department emphasizes this identity question its Professional and Workplace Writing course, which is a great one if you’re interested in effective communication and developing a professional identity.
With that in mind, it makes sense that internships feel uncomfortable. It’s because they are our first experiences building out our professional identities. We spend eight to 12 disorienting weeks trying on different hats, figuring out and deciding what we’ll want to be known for in the office. Do you want to be the outgoing leader? The quiet worker who excels in certain tasks? The Swiss Army knife?
There are endless professional personas to choose from, and you’ve probably only considered this concept in the past three months. So it’s perfectly okay to feel a bit out of body for the summer. But don’t let it discourage or embarrass you.
Not every new endeavor is “LARPing,” and not all “LARPing” is bad. There’s a difference between pretending to be someone you aren’t, and trying to emulate who you want to become. As rising young professionals, the latter is something we should get used to, even if dressing up for work feels like going to a costume party, learning your firm’s jargon is like reading the script of a canceled TV show, or attempting any task is just a waste of your boss’ time.
As uncomfortable as it may be for the first few months or years, the outfits, the language and the duties will become a part of who you are, which will at hopefully be a leader of your industry.
If you ever feel like you’re “LARPing,” just have a quick laugh at yourself, remember where you are on the journey and carry on. As silly as you feel in the moment, you really are on the right path. Because contrary to real “LARPers,” you can absolutely become the effective, respected professional that you’re emulating today. But no matter how much Dungeons and Dragons you play, you’ll never become a wizard…
