By Abby Rathburn | Staff Writer
You become what you consume. If you choose to immerse yourself in a culture that redefines love as something transactional and short-lived, your life will become that way — just know it will break you.
In her popular song, “Ghost in the Machine,” SZA writes about the emotional disconnect that exists between people who share physical intimacy but lack genuine connection.
“Can you distract me from all the disaster? Can you touch on me and not call me after?” asks SZA.
On the surface, this seems to be a longing for momentary pleasure; however, she goes on to write that she needs humanity. Surrounded by those who lack it, she is crying for help in an effort to find a genuine connection.
According to research published by the Boston Congress of Public Health Review, 60% of first-year undergraduate college students report having hooked up with another individual in their freshman year.
Furthermore, a study by the National Library of Medicine suggests that the more frequent the hookups, the greater the psychological stress, leading to increased feelings of loneliness, discontent and depression.
During sex, a chemical known as oxytocin is released. It deepens feelings of closeness, encouraging the formation of long-lasting sentiments of mate bonding and attachment.
In the Bible, Christians are cautioned about this behavior through descriptions of the unity that takes place within these relationships.
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh,” (Genesis 2:24).
Whether you want to admit it or not, sex can never truly be casual. Even so, undergraduates routinely turn to it in college, as they seek the “college experience,” in an effort to cure feelings of loneliness.
Let me be clear. This is not a call of judgment for anyone who has or continues to pursue casual relationships. I am trying to draw attention to the fact that there are negative consequences — consequences that the media doesn’t want to talk about.
While some have talked about these negatives, the vast majority of mainstream media continues to emphasize the positive experiences, creating a skewed perception of reality for individuals everywhere.
Dr. Alan B. Eppel, director of Community Psychiatric Services at St. Joseph’s Hospital and clinical professor, echoes this need for true connection in a paper published by the Canadian Medical Association Journal.
“People need to develop deeper and more genuine connections or face the public and personal health consequences of attachment disorder,” Eppel said.
If you or anyone you know is dealing with negative mental side effects from casual sex, peer pressure or any other reason, do not hesitate to reach out to the Baylor University Counseling Center. Your feelings are recognized and valued, and our university is dedicated to helping you find the connection you long for in the right way.
